IELTS Writing Task 2 Recruiting Employees
Some people believe that company owners ought to recruit employees who are innovative and can work independently, while others maintain that gregarious employees with a high level of team spirit make better personnel.
Discuss both viewpoints and given your own opinions.
? Essayist: Sasan
These days, fierce competitions((competition)) among companies make((makes)) the employers choose their workforce with military precision. Some believe creative staff can maximize the efficiency of a company, however, some surmise that workers’ team spirit makes a company reach its zenith. I personally concur with the latter viewpoint.
Many business owners think that creativity and innovation are the sole ingredients for((ingredients of)) success. In fact, they suppose that innovative people can optimize every system and they are like short-cuts to the journey of progress((short-cut to a product, rather than a process, and journey of progress is a process, which semantically does not make sense.)). For instance, in a research and development company whose employees work on the optimization of a system, a new, practical procedure((new and practical procedures)) only springs((spring)) to a creative person’s mind. So, hiring these sorts((it’s better to say “this sort of” because it refers to one single group of people)) of people lead((leads, the subject is “hiring”)) to cutting down the expenditures and also expediting the processes.
Nevertheless, some maintain that two heads are better than one. In fact, today, all tasks had better((in the majority of cases, the subject of “had better” is a person or an animate entity, and not objects or things.)) be carried out collaboratively and((it’s better to use another conjunction to show reasoning, e.g. “because” or “as”.)) everybody has some weak points and strengths simultaneously. And((Do not start an independent clause with “and”.)) a well-informed manager should have the insight to put((come up with useful insights into putting)) every person in a correct position. For example, some people are so fast in((fast at)) doing repetitive, boring assignments and some are impeccable in injecting new ideas in((injecting new ideas into)) different systems in order to find solutions for daunting issues. Moreover, esprit de corps is at the top of the list and it solidifies the integrity of the workforce in handling projects. In my perspective((From my perspective)), it is admirable if people learn to be autonomous and stand on their own feet or paddle their own canoes when it comes to their specific tasks, nevertheless, only((it’s better to invert this sentence because of “only”.)) powerful groups can push the frontiers of knowledge forwards((push forward, and not push forwards)).
To sum up, it seems to me that team spirit and collaborative actions((collaborative activities)) take precedence over individual systems, nonetheless, everybody needs to be perfect in his or her specialty.
- Coherence: Great!
- Cohesion: Above average
- Grammar: Average
- Reasoning: Good
- Essay Analysis:
- Word Count: “295” Excellent!
- The Academic Writing test takes 60 minutes. It consists of two tasks. The recommended time for each task is: 20 minutes on Task 1, and 40 minutes on Task 2. Between the two tasks of your Academic Writing Test, you are free to start from the one you like.
- Your essay should include at least 250 words.
- In this task, your ability to respond to a topic, generate relevant ideas, outline problems and offer solutions to the problems based on your experience and reasoning is measured.
- IELTS Writing Task 2 falls into the category of argumentative essays.
- IELTS Writing Task 2, compared to IELTS Writing Task 1, carries more weight in scoring.
- Your reader is an educated person with only general knowledge of the topic.
Tips on Planning Your Essay
- Read the questions and instructions closely.
- Examine the topic and the central focus.
- Decide on your focused thoughts and ideas about the question.
- Practice brainstorming to come up with valuable ideas to be used in your answer.
- Organize your formulated ideas in some paragraphs.
- Start the essay with an introduction.