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IELTS Writing Task 1 on Online Shopping Sales in 2013

Published on May 26th, 2023 | Last updated on June 1st, 2023 by | 2 Comments on IELTS Writing Task 1 on Online Shopping Sales in 2013 | 375 Views | Reading Time: 3 minutes

IELTS Writing Task 1 on online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Join LELB Society students and members and send us your IELTS essays and reports for thorough analysis during your monthly membership.

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Write a report on Online Shopping Sales

The pie charts above display the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarize the visual information shown in the pie charts by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons when necessary.

Source of visual data: https://www.ieltscareerzone.in/

IELTS Writing Task 1 on Online Shopping Sales

This pie chart portrays the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. As it is evident the pie chart is divided into 4 sections, clothes, books, film/music, and travel.

  1. Such an ideal first paragraph!
  2. These (2) pie charts

The biggest portion of the online shopping sales in the year 2003 is for travel with 36% and in the year 2013 is for music and film with 33%. On the contrary, books have the lowest rank in the year 2003 with only 19%, and clothes in the year 2013 with 22%. The three percent-elevation of book sales between these 10 years demonstrates that people in New Zealand tend to read more books which is good news. The reduction in clothes percentage_ which was 16% in 2013_ shows that people are less materialistic.

  1. A part of a sentence as an ellipsis is marked with dashes or parentheses, and not underlines.

The pie chart also illustrates that people’s passion for music and cinema in New Zealand increased highly between these 10 years with a 12% gap. Moreover, fewer people tend to travel because the portion of travel in 2013 is 29%, which means it had a 7% reduction.

  1. You could use “a decade” instead of “10 years”.
  2. You could use “drop / decrease” instead of “reduction” as you’ve used it twice.

Analysis and scoring

  • Analysis
    • Overall, the report is well-written.
    • You could use more intensifiers, such as sharply, moderately, etc.
  • Cohesion and coherence: 20 of 25%
  • Grammatical range and accuracy: 20 of 25%
  • Lexical resources: 18 of 25%
  • Task achievement: 22 of 25%
  • Spelling: Great
  • Punctuation: Great
  • Word Count: “179 Words” – Excellent
  • Time on Report Writing: “ 20 Minutes” –Perfect
  • Band score: 7.5 of 9

About Armaghan Houshmand

Armaghan Houshmand is an enthusiastic twenty-year-old student who is passionate about art, music, cinema, languages and literature. She can speak Persian and English fluently. She is currently working on her writing skills and her French and German.

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2 comments on “IELTS Writing Task 1 on Online Shopping Sales in 2013”

  1. This pie chart portrays the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. As it is evident the pie chart is divided into 4 sections, clothes, books, film/music, and travel.
    The biggest portion of the online shopping sales in the year 2003 is for travel with 36% and in the year 2013 is for music and film with 33%. On the contrary, books have the lowest rank in the year 2003 with only 19%, and clothes in the year 2013 with 22%. The three percent-elevation of book sales between these 10 years demonstrates that people in New Zealand tend to read more books which is good news. The reduction in clothes percentage_ which was 16% in 2013_ shows that people are less materialistic.
    The pie chart also illustrates that people’s passion for music and cinema in New Zealand increased highly between these 10 years with a 12% gap. Moreover, fewer people tend to travel because the portion of travel in 2013 is 29%, which means it had a 7% reduction.

    Time spent on writing: 20 minutes.

    Reply
    • Thank you for submitting your report to us for analysis. It will be evaluated before the next online class.

      Reply

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