IELTS – TOEFL Preparation Course | Session 6
Writing Task
Topic: Some people think that when recruiting, companies should aim to take on people who are innovative and able to work independently, while others maintain that companies should recruit people who are able to work in a team and follow the instructions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Paragraph on recruiting employees
In today`s challenging world, employers need to collaborate of the various skills that the team brings together. For instance, innovation and creativity can be improved through team involvement because informing is shared amongst the team members. Beside, teamwork can help companies tackle a difficult situation more effectively since each member brings different strengths and ideas to deal with problems. Therefore, in last decade companies should hire interdependent who can come together to perform effectively and get result.
In today`s challenging world, employers need to collaborate of the various skills that the team brings together. For instance, innovation and creativity can be improved through team involvement because informing is shared amongst the team members. Beside, teamwork can help companies tackle a difficult situation more effectively since each member brings different strengths and ideas to deal with problems. Therefore, in last decade companies should hire interdependent who can come together to perform effectively and get result.
Line 1: collaborate :arrow: integrate, and omit “of”
Line 2: It’s better to say: innovation and creativity can improve …
Line 3: information is shared
Line 3: beside :arrow: besides
in last decade: in the following decade, companies should hire interdependent employees who can work together to perform their tasks more effectively and get better results.
Thank you.
You’re welcome.
The hiring process is not an easy issue for human resource department in the certain company and they should do this task with accuracy. First, it is clear that creativity and innovation are significant for the success of a company and they should recruitment the people who are innovative. On the other hand, human resource department should consider that teamwork is an important issue. To conclude, I think it’s essential that they recruitment the people who have both advantages.
Recruitment is a noun, the verb form is recruit. You should use a verb in lines 3 and 5.
Great! Thank you.
Thank you so much.
Glad to see you’re learning from each other in an interactive mode.
I think you should use companies in line 2.
I don’t see “company” in Line 2.
Human Resource”S”
You were supposed to develop a supporting paragraph. You just rephrased what Fatemeh had written about.
Line 1: for Human Resources departments in any company
Line 1: They :arrow: employers or company managers
As Fatemeh pointed it out, the verb form is “recruit”.
People :arrow: employees
Last phrase: who are blessed with both of the traits.
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Anytime! You’re so welcome.
Recruitment is a critical phase which should be done by considerable attention. On one hand, having independent employees who are able to provide innovative ideas is necessary; on the other hand, we need to have obedient workers who are proficient in teamwork in order to have a cohesive system in the work place. It seems that employers should train and recruit those candidates who are capable of having both of these characteristics.
Hi. I’m not sure but I think it’s better to use “the” before “considerable” on the first line. Please consider that vanish the space between work & place on the fourth line.
Thank you.
You’re welcome.
‘The’ before ‘attention’ is NOT needed.
With considerable attention
On the one hand,
Teamwork does not require much proficiency. So it’s better to say: those who are willing to have teamwork.
workplace, as stated by Arash
In an argumentative essay, your introductory paragraph should not be impartial or unbiased. Instead, you should clarify your position.