IELTS – TOEFL Preparation Course | Session 24
Writing Task
Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private lives?
These days, some believe celebrities are treated unfairly by he media and they need to have more privacy. I personally believe that nobody has the right to ruin their privacy but they should care about their deeds strongly.
To begin with, it is not reasonable to spoil the privacy of famous people and stick our noses into their lives. Otherwise, they would be hurt by the society and cannot have positive effects as role models. For instance, it is ridiculous to focus on the personal lives of famous people in the society. So, it had better respect the boundaries between famous people’s personal lives and their jobs. Nevertheless, nobody can deny the fact that famous people would be imitated by people especially the young. So, they need to be careful about their behaviors, beliefs, appearances, etc.
Line 1: he :arrow: the media
Line 4: celebrities are not necessarily role models.
Line 8: It’s better to use a singular form of “appearance”.
Line 8: etc. = and other. So, “and” before “etc.” is redundant.
These days, some believe celebrities are treated unfairly by he media and they need to have more privacy. I personally believe that nobody has the right to ruin their privacy but they should care about their deeds strongly.
To begin with, it is not reasonable to spoil the privacy of famous people and stick our noses into their lives. Otherwise, they would be hurt by the society and cannot have positive effects as role models. For instance, it is ridiculous to focus on the personal lives of famous people in the society. So, it had better respect the boundaries between famous people’s personal lives and their jobs. Nevertheless, nobody can deny the fact that famous people would be imitated by people especially the young. So, they need to be careful about their behaviors, beliefs, appearances, and etc.
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